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Quote of the Moment

Lecter: Good evening, Clarice.

Lecter: "Nothing happened to me, Officer Starling. I happened. You can't reduce me to a set of influences. You've given up good and evil for behaviorism, Officer Starling. You've got everybody in moral dignity pants- nothing is ever anybody's fault. Look at me, Officer Starling. Can you stand to say I'm evil? Am I evil, Officer Starling?"

Crawford: Believe me, you don't want Hannibal Lecter in your head... Just do your job, but never forget what he is.

Starling: And what is that?

Crawford: Oh, he's a monster. A pure psychopath.

Starling: Most serial killers like to keep some sort of trophy from their victims.

Lecter: I didn't.

Starling: No. No, you ate yours.

Lecter: A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with fava beans and a nice Chianti.

Starling: But if you didn't kill him, then who did?

Lecter: Who can say...? Best thing for him, really. His therapy was going nowhere.

Lecter: Garden variety manic-depressive. Tedious. Very tedious.

Starling: What happened to your drawings?

Lecter: Punishment, you see. For Miggs. Just like that gospel program. When you leave, they'll turn the volume way up. Dr. Chilton does enjoy his petty torments.

Lecter: I do wish we could chat longer, but.... I'm having an old friend for dinner... Bye.

Starling: With all due respect, Doctor, if you fuck with me I'll shoot you dead, here and now. Do you understand that?

Lecter: Perfectly.

Starling: Do right and you'll live through this.

Lecter: Spoken like a Protestant.

Buffy: I wasn't gonna use violence. Do I always use violence?

Xander: The important thing is that you believe that.

Angel: I thought we had... you know.

Buffy: A date? So did I. But who am I kidding? Dates are things normal girls have. Girls who have time to think about nail polish and facials. You know what I think about? Ambush tactics. Beheading. Not exactly the stuff dreams are made of.

Oz: Hey, did everybody just see that guy turn into dust?

Willow: Uh, sort of.

Xander: Yep. Vampires are real; lot of 'em live in Sunnydale. Willow'll fill ya in.

Willow: I know it's hard to accept at first...

Oz: No, actually, it explains a lot.

Xander: Buffy, this is not about the animals. This is about not being in class.

Buffy: You know, you're right. Now the animals look new and shiny!

Buffy: Sacred duty, yada, yada, yada...

Cordelia: Being this popular is not just my right, but my responsibility, and I want you to know I take it very seriously.

Cordelia: Darn, I have cheerleading practice tonight. Boy, I wish I knew you were gonna be digging up dead people tonight; I would have canceled.

Cordelia: She (Buffy) is like this Superman. Shouldn't there be different rules for her.

Willow: Sure, in a fascist society.

Cordelia: Right! Why can't we have one of those?

Cordelia: Buffy, love your hair, it just screams street urchin.

Willow: Uh, Angel, if I say something you don't wanna hear do you promise not to bite me?

Willow: I don't get wild. Wild on me equals spaz.

Angel: I guess I need help. And you're the first person I thought of.

Willow: Help? Like you mean on homework? No, `cause you're old and already know stuff.

Angel: I want to track someone down. On the Net.

Willow: Oh! Great. I'm so the Net girl.

Willow: Even I was bored. And I'm a science nerd.

Ampata: You're strange.

Xander: Girls always tell me that. Right before they run away.

Xander: Calvary's here. Calvary's a frightened guy with a rock, but it's here.

Xander: I'm seventeen. Looking at linoleum makes me want to have sex.

Xander: Buffy! I feel a pre-birthday spanking coming on-

Xander: I don't like vampires. I'm gonna take a stand and say they're not good.

Spike: It's paradise! Big windows and lovely gardens. They'll be perfect when we want the sunlight to kill us.

Spike: I'll only kill ya this once.

Spike: Are we feeling better then?

Drusilla: I'm naming all the stars.

Spike: Can't see the stars love. That's the ceiling. Also, it's day.

Drusilla: I can see them, and I've named them all the same name, and there's terrible confusion. I fear there may be a duel.

Drusilla: My Mummy used to sing me to sleep at night. 'Run and catch, the lamb is caught in the blackberry patch...' What will your Mummy sing when they find your body?

Neo ::wince after trying a drink made by Dozer:: Ugh...

Cypher: Good shit, huh? It's good for two things: decreasing engines and killing brain cells.

Agent Smith: I'd like to share a revelation that I've had, during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species. I realized that you're not actually mammals. Every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the surrounding environment, but you humans do not. You move to an area, and you multiply, and multiply, until every natural resource is consumed. The only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. A virus. Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet, you are a plague, and we are the cure.

Neo: Why do my eyes hurt?

Morpheus: You've never used them before.

Morpheus: There is a difference between knowing the path and taking the path.

Oracle: You're cuter than I thought. I can see why she likes you.

Neo: Who?

Oracle: Not too bright, though.

Morpheus: The pill you took is part of a trace program. It's designed to disrupt your input/output carrier signal so we can pinpoint your location.

Neo: What does that mean?

Cypher: It means, buckle your seatbelt, Dorothy, because Kansas is going bye-bye.

Morpheus: Stop trying to hit me and hit me!

Tank: So what do you need besides a miracle.

Trinity: Guns. Lots of guns.

Trinity: Neo, no one has ever done this before.

Neo: I know. That's why it's going to work.

Cypher: I know what you're thinking 'cause right now I'm thinking the same thing. Actually I've been thinking the same thing ever since I got here: Why, oh why, didn't I take the blue pill?

Agent Smith: Never send a human to do a machines job.

Neo: What are you trying to tell me? That I can dodge bullets?

Morpheus: No, Neo. I'm trying to tell you that when you're ready, you won't have to.

Trinity: My name's Trinity.

Neo: The Trinity? Who cracked the IRS d-base in Kansas?

Trinity: That was a long time ago.

Neo: Jesus...

Trinity: What?

Neo: I just thought... you were a guy.

Trinity: Most guys do.

Dante: I'm not even supposed to be here today.

Randal: People say crazy shit during sex. One time, this girl called me, "Mom."

Randal: Which do you like better? Jedi? or The Empire Strikes Back?

Dante: Empire.

Randal: Blasphemy.

Dante: "Empire" had the better ending. Luke gets his hand cut off, finds out Vader is his father, uh, Han gets frozen, taken away by Boba Fett. It ends on such a down note. I mean, that's what life is: a series of down endings. All "Jedi" had was a bunch of muppets.

Dante: You hate people!

Randal: But I love gatherings. Isn't it irnoic?

Randal: She'll get over fuckin the dead guy. Shit, my Mom has been fucking a dead guy for thiry years; I call him Dad.

Dante: My friend here is trying to convince me that any independent contracters who were working on the uncompleted Death Star were victims of the rebels.

Jay: Tonight we're gonna go to the fucking party, rip off their fucking heads, and take their fuckin souls!

Randal: I know I'm your hero.

Dante: I'm stuck in this pit, working for less than slave wages, working on my day off, the steel shutters are closed, I deal with every backward-assed fuck on the planet, I smell like shoe polish, my ex-girlfriend is catatonic after fucking a dead guy, and my present girlfriend has sucked thirty-six dicks.

Randal: Thirty-seven.

Randal: This job would be great if not for the fucking customers.

Randal: I don't appreciate your ruse, Ma'am.

Customer: Ruse?

Randal: Your ruse. Your cunning attempt to trick me.

Dante: You ever notice all the prices end in nine? Damn, that's eerie.

Silent Bob: There is a million fine looking women in this world, Dude. But, they all don't bring you lasgna at work. Most of `em just cheat on ya.

Randal: There is nothing more exhilirating than pointing out the short comings of others, is there?

Jay: Where do you get these wonderful toys?

Brodie: Cookie stand's not part of the food court.

T.S.: Sure it is.

Brodie: The food court is downstairs the cookie stand is upstairs it's not like we're talking quantum physics here!

T.S.: The cookie stand is an eatery, an eatery is part of the food court.

Brodie: Bullshit! Eateries that operate within the designated square downstairs qualify as food court, anything operating outside the said designated square is considered an autonomous unit for mid-mall snacking.

Brodie: My grandmother always said, "Why buy the cow...when you get the sex for free."

Jay: Fly fat ass! Fly!

Brandie: Second suitor, would you ever make whoopie in public?

Brodie: I already did once today! But my cousin Walter jerked off in public once. True story. He was on this plane to New Mexico when all of the sudden the hydraulics went. The plane starts spinning around, going out of control, so he figures it's all over and whips it out and starts beating it right there. So all the other passengers take a cue from him and they start whipping it out and beating like mad! So all the passengers are beating off, plummeting to their certain doom, when all of the sudden, the hydraulics kick back in. The plane rights itself and they land safely and everyone puts their penises or, whatever, you know, away and deboard. No one mentions the phenomenon to anyone else.

Gill: Well, did he cum, or what?

Brodie: Jesus Christ, man! There's just some things you don't talk about in public!

Jay: Silent Bob stole the schematics from some foolish carpenter and found a weakness just like the fucking Death Star. You knock this crossbeam out and, bicky bam, the whole stage comes crashing down.

Brodie: Well we were thinking of something simple, but hey, if you want to destroy the stage, we're all for that.

Brodie: I would've made a sexy chick.

Brodie: Listen, not a year goes by, not a year, that I don't hear about some escalator accident involving some bastard kid which could have easily been avoided had some parent -I don't care which one- but some parent conditioned him to fear and respect that escalator!

Shannon: I'm gonna fuck you up beyond repair.

Silent Bob: Excitment, adventure.... a Jedi craves not these things.

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